De-Stress. Now.
10.28.11| S
Your doctor has probably told you that stress will cause flare ups. Regardless of the chronic illness, stress is an easy (and valid) scapegoat. Stress gets you agitated. Stress raises your blood pressure. Stress causes flares and inflammation and pain. Stress is stressful to think about it.
Before it turns into a cyclical mess, what can you do about stress?
Was your first response nothing? That there’s nothing that can be done about stress.
Or did it feel more like a joke with yourself? “Oh gee, I guess I could quit my job and be less stressed.”
These responses really imply the same root feeling. Hopelessness. When you feel like you lack control in your daily life, whether your internal monologue is matter-of-fact or sarcastic, that’s a pretty sad place to be. Think about it, what you’re saying is that you’re not in control of your life or your path. And that’s crazy.
What CAN be done about stress is a change in thinking.
Take responsibility. You can’t control what other people think, feel, say or do. But you do have control of all of those things for yourself. Meditation is a remarkable practice for learning to tame your own mind. Similarly, actions and words (i.e. what you say) are certainly within your direct command – simply take a breath and you’ll find you have more time to say or do the right thing. In the space between, there are decisions you’ve made that have lead to where you are (professionally, interpersonally, etc.) and mishaps along the way, but own those too. It’s part of life.
Take action. While you can’t control what others think, feel, say or do. You do control your relationship to those others. If you reach the conclusion that a situation you are in is not serving you personally, if it’s causing you more stress than benefit, if it’s leaving you feeling agitated, tired, or especially flared up, make a change in your relationship. Whether it’s a personal or professional matter, remember that you do control your relationship to it.
Accept the rest. It is really easy to get worked up and stressed out about things completely outside of your personal control. In fact, it can be very fun to talk about what that one person did or what’s going on next door, as if the gossip somehow makes up for being outside of the situation. However, for your own sanity, accept what you cannot change. And remember that acceptance is also a decision (to take responsibility for).
In a way, it comes back to the serenity prayer: ”…grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.” I omitted the God-piece because I find it easier to take this prayer as a sort of intention.
How do you manage stress?


Having this disease makes me feel a lot of things. Pain, frustration, resentment, and more often than I like to admit, I feel angry. I get pissed off and upset about the fact that I can’t do the things I want to do, that my body doesn’t allow me to maintain a regular schedule (you can’t plan for flare ups), and that I am different from my peers in a way that they don’t understand.
So, I’ve totally dropped the ball on keeping up with this blog. It’s been a year and a half since my